It's been a while. Just a couple fun things as I countdown to my 20-year anniversary in the domain investment business this coming week on December 26th. A 3-part series before I go back to retired life waiting for the 25th. But just like it was 20 years ago, people will be distracted with their holiday vacations. Today, just a little silly fun and humor. Hope you enjoy it!
Twas the day after Christmas when all through the house not a phone line was ringing so I just clicked my mouse.
My numbers were done and a spreadsheet confirmed that 1995 was over and 96 had begun.
The kitty-kat was nestled on top of my bed. While visions of millions danced in my head.
I went out on a limb and there arose such a chatter, I sprang to my feet to climb the tall ladder.
Away to Windows I flew like a flash, tore open my mind and was just a bit brash.
To the moon and beyond in the new fallen idea the luster of money should soon appear.
With a few extra dollars so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick
More rapid than eagles the coins they came and I whistled and shouted and called them by name.
Dot Com this and Dot Com that. Oh my goodness and look at dat!
Now pennies then nickels and dimes all day led me to discover new ways to make hay.
I plowed and plowed and plowed til May thinking of a time a score away.
I planted the seed to grow a tree and planted another to frame the sun. Oh my what a forrest it has become.
Two decades later I survived the zoo, Know one thing you never knew.
Whoever reads this and whatever they do. I'll promise right now to never bore you.
Domains to the rescue and on to the stars, to the moon and beyond and even Mars.
And time right now to fly away, I think I've had my my final say.
Good luck to all and to all a good night!
And here is a little extra bonus to twist your brain. I know it twisted mine!!
In 1996 I started writing using domain names I owned in a post I made that actually made sense. It was a little more colorful using only adult domains as you will see below and a bit easier confining it to one basic subject. So here is my modern day version: RATED R++. So be warned! 333 domains (at last count) used possibly making this the longest domain speak in history. Where is Guinness?
So while sitting with my virtualgirlfriend.com who was wearing sexyunderwear.com that I bought at the pornstore.com, sipping some chiantiwine.com singing christmascarols.com on my property.com having a little candy.com and watching some porno.com, I got off my ass.com to go into erealestate.com where I figured I could make some homemade.com jointventures.com. It was like 1969.com all over again. It would help beginners.com and the unemployed.com take down their jobwanted.com sign to be able to retrain.com in computerservice.com or get bachelordegrees.com and become virtualteachers.com so they could get the greatestjob.com. Maybe someday make awardwinningsites.com. and make the top40list.com or even the top10list.com. That might send the topheadhunters.com looking their way and they will never kissass.com
So let's gettogether.com and startthinking.com then startbelieving.com then startmakingmoney.com so we can startliving.com on the way to delray.com and traffic2004.com and make new associations.com. Some were born in 1978.com while others were born in 1969.com or 1964.com or even 1923.com. I thought of all the widgets.com that would need wholesaling.com to onlineshoppers.com and who the beneficiaries.com would be and how that might impact the grandchildren.com who can shoptilyoudrop.com
So first I went to the giftdepartment.com where I saw giftsformen.com and then giftsforwomen.com to find the hottestgifts.com with factoryrebates.com on the way to the servicedepartment.com next to the partsdept.com where I thought of some prankgifts.com for the starscars.com but I still wanted the hottestbargains.com.
I looked at the hottestbooks.com and the hottestfashions.com worn by the hottestcelebrties.com and hottestmodels.com going to the hottestplaces.com hanging with the hottestplayers.com but I was still focused on the hottestsales.com. The hotteststars.com in their pristinecars.com and limodrivers.com want to go to the hottestspots.com. They get the hottesttickets.com at the hottestshows.com and eat at the hottestrestaurants.com. But I am still looking for the hottestdeals.com on the hottestproducts.com at the hottestprice.com. But the hottestcelebs.com are going to the hottestclubs.com with the hottestchicks.com on the hottestdates.com all because they are hotshit.com and make the hottestmovies.com, hottestvideos.com and hottestmusic.com and become the hottestnews.com usually started by the hottestrumor.com and then they have to leave by finding the hottestfares.com and wherever they go they will still be the hottestgame.com in town.
I saw domains as goldfutures.com and investmentdiamonds.com and focused on investmentqualitydomains.com. I saw domains as incomeproperty.com to buyandlease.com. I saw domains as foreigninvestments.com that would aid foreignrelations.com and capable of worldbroadcasting.com. The cheapest.com properties.com in the world and wanted to be the modelhomes.com worldchamp.com
I had productstosell.com but I had to worry about protecting.com them as they were unsafe.com from the cyberbully.com and hijackers.com. It forced me to become an expert on trademarking.com. Because these asses.com were the biggestjerks.com and biggestassholes.com and would need a courtorder.com issued by a grandjury.com and then gosueme.com because bribes.com or a silly ceaseanddesist.com letter was just going to be my bestlaugh.com. They were nothing more than a rodent.com to me and I became their biggestmistake.com. Thanks to hallofshame.com and RDNH rulings.com I was able to give some lawtips.com to the inexperienced.com instead of lipservice.com.
The biggestplayers.com came to wager.me and it cost many thousands in protecting.com me and you and hopefully the futureanalysis.com would support that. My ladygodiva.com vs Campbell's; My goofoff.com vs Lilly Inc.; My carnivalsucks.com vs Carnival Cruise Lines; My daisydukes.com vs Warner Brothers; My tstv.com vs Toronto Star Newspapers. lipservice.com vs who even cares? Slam Bam corporatebullies.com!! I won the biggestcontests.com because I had the biggestballs.com before there was a UDRP process and saveme.com vs the world when there was one! NEXT!
What I was doing was topsecret.com but I had a workschedule.com to worksmarter.com as I could workanywhere.com and reside in the worldsbestplacestolive.com because I wanted to go to the worldsbesttravelspots.com and knew that if I had long term aspirations workingoff.com the Internet, the generalpublic.com, who may be the jurors.com, would understand the uniquemomentinhistory.com and sense of urgency at making my stake and would like to be filthy.com rich too. It's a kinkyfantasy.com that most people understand just like folks like freeshit.com and the dailydouble.com. I decided to gobet.com on it because ihavefaithin.com and I could buynowpaylater.com because Netsol had no xxxcashier.com to pay for ricksdomains.com and that gave me availablecredit.com that I would have never had.
When I was born cheapland.com was inherited.com. It was all sold and owned. There was no more freeadmission.com or freenights.com. But I did see that virtualbillboards.com could be planted throughout the world and I could compete with the worldsbestsalesmen.com with the worldsbeststuff.com. That gave me the bestodds.com that dailyevents.com would help me geteven.com and then use demonstrations.com by famousamericans.com at tradeshows.com and chatboards.com to getexcited.com about the hottestdomains.com where companies were exhibiting.com.
I don't eat russiancaviar.com but I can sell some. I don't wear cubiczirconia.com but I can sell some. I know nothing about uniformrentals.com but it could become a full time career. I am not into wholesalejewelry.com but I can get the bestvalues.com with jades.com and sparklers.com and even a pinkdiamond.com. I can buythat.com and then iexport.com. I can buywholesale.com and buyworldwide.com. I could buycloseouts.com and I can buylobsters.com, buysoap.com, buyclothing.com, and look for the biggestdiscounts.com and clearences.com and buybargains.com then sellprodu
I may have had the worstsites.com but the enterbutton.com that led to the virtualtours.com made me millions by affiliateadvertising.com and I was still getting screwed.com by the biggestwinners.com with the biggestripoffs.com. They never saw domaintraffic.com before and that potenttraffic.com provoked a good screwing.com and fakeout.com every so often for my "Fake" traffic. I would say screwyou.com and tell them if they continue with sneaky.com stupidmoves.com like cheating.com me that they will earn a spot on unfairbusiness.org and I would make them the mostfamousperson.com on the internet with their bigripoff.com and let folks know what whores.com they were and that gave me the power to be an sob.com and I was not faking.com. They put me in the virtualcollections.com
I guess I was a shameful.com banker.com who was overeating.com with a wad.com of money and looking for honest webmasterprograms.com so I could become an authorizedreseller.com and promote advertisedspecials.com and add to my christmasclub.com. I started buying adultbooks.com at wholesaleprices.com looking at personalads.com because I knew singlepeople.com wanted to look for greatass.com and getlaid.com. The only way to make extracash.com back then was with porncash.com because there was no mainstreamamerica.com in 1996 and 1997. Google did not exist. So a dailyprayer.com would not even get you a freephonecall.com or cheapestfares.com if you are goingplaces.com like grandcentralstation.com fordirections.com on the way to see hitshows.com.
males.com wants.com hotdates.com with sexychicks.com, naughtwiv
prettymodels.com and partygirls.com were everywhere. men.com think they can makeout.com because they think they are a stud.com, get horny.com and start seducing.com the prettyladies.com and if I write anymore it will be x-rated.com and the prudes.com will get upset even tho whore.com, slut.com, vagina.com and virgins.com etc. are used all day everyday on TV that our kids gowatch.com and they are not censoring.com them and either are the grandparents.com because they are just wickedteens.com hotrodding.com to the stripjoints.com to have a cold-beer.com and make xxxvideos.com.
Makes you startthinking.com so startthere.com and startsearching.com. startoff.com by startworking.com so you can startvoting.com so that you can startout.com not being a starvingartist.com because you needmoremoney.com and then you can get preapprovedloans.com, speak to financialconsultants.com, taxplanners.com and become a stockinsider.com and maybe even a domainking.com and gofirstclass.com as you goup.com the ladder.
So after 20 years they can stoplaughing.com at the craziest.com idea because theking.com has written salestips.com on his tipsheet.com that many a domainseller.com like me have used to make the year's biggestsale.com. I'm not bluffing.com and ireport.com I can make you that can give me some bragging.com rights while retiredinboca.com relaxing on my casualfurniture.com and watching funnymovies.com
This all just reconfirmed.com that typeins.com were not a violation.com and realeyeballs.com by a realliveperson.com capable of finding and previewing.com realistic.
And now that you made it through all of that I hope it brought a few smiles to your face and a few memories. Now on to my 20-year anniversary posts next week..... Happy Holidays and the best to you in 2016 and beyond!